Dadvotionals

Silent Struggles: The Never-Ending Grind

Part 5 of the “What Men Carry and How God Lifts” Series

Everywhere you turn, there’s pressure to do more.

Work harder. Earn more. Climb higher.

And while you’re at it, be the perfect husband, the intentional dad, the loyal friend, and the strong man of faith who has it all figured out. The world doesn’t slow down, and neither do the expectations. So, you push. You grind. You tell yourself this is what it takes to be a man – to make sure your family has what they need and then some.

But here’s the thing: no matter how hard you run, it feels like the finish line keeps moving.

There’s always another bill, another project, another problem to solve. The harder you chase, the further out of reach it seems to get. That weight can feel suffocating – because deep down, you don’t want to fail the people counting on you. You don’t want to be the man who didn’t provide, who didn’t show up, who didn’t make it happen. So you keep running, even when your legs are heavy and your soul feels dry.

This relentless pursuit of “more” convinces us that our worth is tied to our work – that the measure of a man is the size of his paycheck, the title on his door, or how much he can hustle before he breaks. But that was never God’s design. He never called us to live under the constant pressure of proving ourselves. Scripture reminds us:

“Unless the Lord builds the house, those who build it labor in vain. Unless the Lord watches over the city, the watchman stays awake in vain.”
– Psalm 127:1

When we chase success without surrender, we end up with sore backs and empty hearts.

God cares about your work. He values diligence and responsibility. But He also cares about your soul. About whether you’re present at the dinner table – not just providing the dinner. About your joy, your rest, and your relationship with Him. And that’s something the grind will never give you. The world says your value is in your production. God says your value was settled at the cross.

So how do you push back against the never-ending grind?

You start by shifting your source of strength. You stop hustling for approval and start working from a place of grace. You remember what Jesus said:

“Come to me, all who labor and are heavy laden, and I will give you rest.”
– Matthew 11:28

Real rest isn’t found in a vacation or a day off – it’s found in Him. It’s the kind of rest that lets you stop proving and start trusting. It’s the kind of rest that reminds you that your worth doesn’t rise and fall with your performance. The grind will always demand more, but you don’t have to live as its slave. You were created for more than endless striving. You were created for purpose – and that purpose flows out of presence with God, not pressure from the world. So, work hard. Lead well. Provide faithfully. But don’t lose yourself in the chase for “enough.” You already have enough in Christ. And because of Him, you are enough too.

Silent Struggles: Empty and Expected

Part 4 of the “What Men Carry and How God Lifts” Series

You give. And then you give some more.
Your time. Your energy. Your focus. Your strength.

Day after day, you show up – for your job, your family, your commitments – because that’s what men do. And if you’re like most of us, you don’t just give what you have… you give beyond what you have. You run on fumes because people are counting on you.

But here’s the part you don’t always say out loud: sometimes, you’re running on empty and still expected to keep going.

The Unspoken Weight of Expectations

The world tells us real men never quit. Our culture says strong husbands and dads always show up, always deliver, always make it happen – no matter what it costs.

And so we keep moving. Even when we’re exhausted. Even when we’re mentally drained. Even when our soul feels bone-dry.

Because we believe that slowing down means letting someone down. And nothing terrifies a good man more than the thought of disappointing the people he loves.

But this constant grind? It leaves us worn out, not just physically – but spiritually, emotionally, and mentally. And if we’re not careful, it can harden our hearts and rob our joy.

Why Do We Do It?

Most men push through because we love deeply.
Because we feel responsible.
Because providing and protecting is in our DNA.

But let’s be honest – sometimes it’s pride too. Sometimes we’d rather suffer silently than admit we need help. Sometimes we’d rather collapse than confess we’re tired.

And over time, we forget this truth: you were never designed to pour from an empty cup.

The Invitation to Rest

Jesus knew this would happen. He knew we’d push ourselves to the edge. That’s why He gave us this invitation:

“Come to me, all who labor and are heavy laden, and I will give you rest.”
– Matthew 11:28

Notice what He didn’t say: “Come to me when you’ve finished everything and have it all under control.”

He said come as you are – tired, drained, burned out. Because real strength doesn’t come from grinding harder. It comes from surrendering sooner.

Refill Before You Run Out

If you’ve been feeling empty, here’s what you need to hear:
Rest is not weakness. It’s wisdom.

Your family doesn’t need a version of you that’s depleted and bitter. They need a man whose soul is anchored, whose spirit is steady, and whose heart is alive in Christ.

That only happens when you stop trying to carry everything alone.

So what does that look like?

Start your day with prayer before you pick up your phone.
Make space for God’s Word – even if it’s five minutes in the morning.
Find a brother in Christ you can be honest with.
Give yourself permission to take a breath – without guilt.

Because when you fill up on God’s strength, you can give without running dry.

You Don’t Have to Be Endless

You will have limits. You will get tired. You will reach the end of yourself.

But here’s the good news: our God renews.

“But they who wait for the Lord shall renew their strength; they shall mount up with wings like eagles; they shall run and not be weary; they shall walk and not faint.”
– Isaiah 40:31

You’re not expected to be endless. You’re invited to be renewed.

So come to Him.
Lay it down.
And let Him fill what life has emptied.

Silent Struggles: My Voice Doesn’t Matter

Part 3 of the “What Men Carry and How God Lifts” Series

There’s a quiet battle that many men fight.
It doesn’t come with shouting.
It doesn’t show up in arguments or accusations.
It comes in the silence.
Not the peaceful kind – but the kind where you start to wonder if your words still carry any weight at all.

This isn’t always because someone is trying to silence you.
In fact, it usually starts from something deeper – something noble: the desire to give everything to the people you love.

So, slowly, without even realizing it, we stop sharing what we think.
We stop saying what we need.
We become providers of peace, stability, protection – and sometimes, at the cost of our own voice.

The Silent Drift

Most of us aren’t told to be quiet.
We choose it.

We think:

“They’ve had a long day – I don’t want to add more.”
“This isn’t the time.”
“It’s not a big deal.”
“If I just keep things steady, that’s what they need from me.”

And often… it is what they need.
But here’s what we sometimes forget: our voice isn’t selfish.

When spoken in love, it’s a gift.
Your insight. Your encouragement. Your truth. Your prayers.
Your presence includes your voice.

“Let the redeemed of the Lord say so, whom He has redeemed from trouble.”
– Psalm 107:2

“The mouth of the righteous is a fountain of life…”
– Proverbs 10:11

God designed you not just to lead by example, but also to lead with words – spoken in wisdom, humility, and strength.

The Internal Weight

When a man believes his voice no longer matters, it doesn’t always lead to anger – it often leads to quiet disconnection.

Not because his family did something wrong.
Not because he’s bitter.
But because he doesn’t want to be a burden.
Because he wants to serve well.
Because he believes love sometimes means keeping your needs quiet and your problems private.

But here’s the truth: God didn’t give you a voice to suppress – it was meant to serve.

Your voice was made to:

Build your family up
Bless your children
Strengthen your marriage
Speak life into your world
Declare the goodness of God in every season

When You Don’t Feel Heard

There will be times when what you say doesn’t seem to resonate.
That doesn’t mean your voice doesn’t matter.
Even Jesus was ignored by people He came to save – yet He never stopped speaking truth in love.

So when you feel unheard:

Keep encouraging
Keep praying out loud
Keep sharing truth
Keep showing up with your presence and your words

Because over time, your consistency speaks even louder than your volume.

“Let no corrupting talk come out of your mouths, but only such as is good for building up… that it may give grace to those who hear.”
– Ephesians 4:29

Lead With Both Strength and Voice

Your role as a man of God isn’t just to show up silently.
It’s to speak intentionally.
Not to dominate, but to edify.
Not to control, but to contribute.

Your voice isn’t just allowed – it’s needed.

Whether you’re praying over your family, offering a word of encouragement, asking for help, or simply being honest about how you’re doing – your voice matters.

And when you offer it in love, it becomes a source of life to everyone around you – including yourself.

You’re Not Being Selfish. You’re Being Faithful.

If you’ve gone quiet – not out of pride, but out of protection – let this be a reminder:

Your voice was never meant to be buried under your burdens.
It was meant to bless, build, and bring truth.

So speak gently. Speak wisely. Speak boldly.

God hears you.
Your family needs you.
And your voice still matters.

Silent Struggles: Just the Provider

Part 2 of the “What Men Carry and How God Lifts” Series

There’s a unique kind of emptiness that hits a man who feels like he’s only valued for what he brings – not for who he is.

You go to work.
You grind.
You pay the bills, keep the lights on, fix the broken stuff, and make the hard calls.

And yet, somewhere along the way, it starts to feel like that’s all you are.
Not a husband. Not a father. Not a friend.
Just… the provider.

The Pressure of Provision

Let’s be clear – providing is godly. It’s a sacred responsibility. Scripture doesn’t shy away from that:

“But if anyone does not provide for his own, and especially for those of his household, he has denied the faith and is worse than an unbeliever.” – 1 Timothy 5:8

Provision is part of how we love. How we protect. It’s noble and necessary. But when it becomes the only thing you’re known for, something starts to fracture inside.

You begin to feel like an employee of your own home.
Not a partner. Not a leader.
Just someone who funds the family but has no place in the heartbeat of it.

The Invisible Man

Most men don’t walk away from their families because of conflict.
They quietly check out because they feel irrelevant.

You stop offering your opinion – because it doesn’t seem to matter.
You stop sharing your feelings – because you’ve been told to “just keep pushing through.”
You bury your exhaustion, your disappointment, your questions – because you don’t want to seem weak.

But hear this clearly:
You were never created to be just a provider.

You were created in the image of a Father who is present, personal, and powerful.
You bring more than money.
You bring you.

You Are Not What You Earn

Jesus said it like this:

“Are not five sparrows sold for two pennies? Yet not one of them is forgotten by God. Indeed, the very hairs of your head are all numbered. Do not be afraid; you are worth more than many sparrows.” – Luke 12:6–7

God doesn’t see you as a paycheck.
He sees you as His son.
His warrior.
His ambassador.
His image-bearer.

Your family may not always say it – but they need your presence more than your performance.

They need your:

Voice
Steadiness
Wisdom
Prayers
Laughter
Leadership
Quiet strength

So What Do You Do With That Weight?

You need to ask yourself if your feelings are actually justified – is your wife, your family really treating you like this or are you lost in your own head? Chances are – even if they do things to make you feel this way – it is NOT their intention. Talk to them.

Most importantly – you bring it to the only One who never reduces you to what you do.

Tell God how it feels to be exhausted and unseen.
Tell Him you feel like you’re giving everything and getting very little in return.
And let Him remind you of this truth:

“The Lord is my portion,” says my soul, “therefore I will hope in Him.” – Lamentations 3:24

You are more than your output.
You are more than your job title.
You are more than your paycheck.

So yes – be faithful at work.
Provide well. Steward wisely.
But don’t mistake your role for your identity.

You’re a man of God. A husband. A father. A friend. A brother.

You are not just a provider.
You are a pillar.

Stand tall in that.

Silent Struggles: Am I Enough?

Part 1 of the “What Men Carry and How God Lifts” Series

I wrote a post not long ago asking a question that most of us – if we’re honest – carry quietly in the back of our minds every single day:
“Am I enough?”
[You can read that original post here.]

But I’ve come to realize this question doesn’t just hit us in the big, life-altering moments.
It shows up in the little things too.
In the seconds after a tough conversation with your wife.
In the silence when your teenager shrugs you off.
In the long days at work that seem to end in exhaustion and doubt.

We don’t always say it out loud, but it’s there:

“Am I doing enough for my family?”
“Am I leading well enough?”
“Am I failing them and not even realizing it?”

The Curse of Constant Measuring

Most men live with an invisible scoreboard in their heads.
We measure our value by what we accomplish, how much we earn, how respected we are, or how few mistakes we’ve made.

We keep score in our marriages.
In our parenting.
In our faith.

And deep down, we’re afraid the final score might say we fell short.

But here’s the thing: God never asked us to live like that.

“He has told you, O man, what is good; and what does the Lord require of you but to do justice, and to love kindness, and to walk humbly with your God?”
– Micah 6:8

God isn’t keeping your score – He’s asking for your heart.

Enough Is Not a Standard – It’s a Surrender

When we ask “Am I enough?” what we’re really asking is:
“Is who I am – without performance or perfection – still worth something?”

And the answer, in Christ, is a resounding yes.

Not because you’ve checked all the boxes.
Not because you got it right today.
But because God’s love for you isn’t based on performance – it’s based on position.

Your identity as a son of God isn’t earned. It’s received.

“See what great love the Father has lavished on us, that we should be called children of God! And that is what we are.”
– 1 John 3:1

This truth doesn’t erase the weight we feel – but it redefines it.
It’s not about being “enough” in your own strength. It’s about knowing you were never meant to carry that weight alone.

Take This With You

You will have days when you miss the mark.
You’ll speak too sharply, love too poorly, lead too passively.
And the enemy will whisper, “See? You’re not enough.”

But the truth is louder if you’ll listen:

“The Lord is my strength and my shield; in Him my heart trusts, and I am helped.”
– Psalm 28:7

You are not enough on your own – and that’s okay.
Because Christ is enough for you.
And in Him, you have everything you need to keep going.
To lead your family.
To love your wife.
To raise your kids.
To walk through every silent struggle… with strength that doesn’t come from you.

So don’t give up.
You were never expected to be perfect.
You were just called to be present. And to keep walking.

You are enough – because He is.

Series Introduction – Silent Struggles: What Men Carry and How God Lifts

There’s a kind of weight that doesn’t show up on the scale.
It lives in the space between the top of your head and the bottom of your heart.
And if you’re like most men, you’ve learned to carry it quietly.

You lead your home. You protect, provide, and persevere. You show up every day because it’s what men do. And if you’re a man of God, you do it all while trying to walk with integrity, lead with faith, and love like Christ – even when no one sees the cost.

But here’s the truth: even the strongest men feel the weight.

You feel it when you wonder if you’re enough.
You feel it when you work long hours and come home to a family that doesn’t know what you sacrificed that day.
You feel it when you’re the rock, but no one asks how you’re really doing.
You feel it when you lie awake at night, thinking about bills, purpose, legacy, or just… surviving another day.

This series – Silent Struggles: What Men Carry and How God Lifts – is for you.

Not because you’re weak. But because you’re strong enough to admit that sometimes strength needs support. That real men don’t ignore their burdens – they bring them to the One who promised:

“Come to Me, all who are weary and burdened, and I will give you rest.” (Matthew 11:28)

This isn’t a pity party. It’s a call to war.
A war against the lie that you need to have it all together.
A war against the idea that real men don’t cry, don’t need help, or don’t get discouraged.
A war for your mind, your marriage, your fatherhood, and your faith.

God never asked you to do this alone.
He created you for brotherhood.
He equipped you for resilience.
And He promised to carry what you can’t.

“The Lord is near to the brokenhearted and saves the crushed in spirit.” (Psalm 34:18)
“Cast your burden on the Lord, and He will sustain you; He will never permit the righteous to be moved.” (Psalm 55:22)

Each post in this series will shine a light on a burden many men carry – but few speak of. You’ll see that you’re not alone, you’re not broken, and you’re not without hope.

You’ll be reminded that being a man of God isn’t about perfection – it’s about persistence.
It’s about showing up, speaking up, and kneeling down before the One who made you to lead not from empty strength, but from surrendered strength.

This is for the providers, the protectors, the men in the middle of the grind.
The husbands who are trying.
The fathers who are learning.
The believers who are holding on.

You’re not alone. You’re not invisible.
And you’re not done.

So, Men… Stay tuned.

Think Long Term

Matthew 6:21 – “For where your treasure is, there your heart will be also.”
Proverbs 13:22 – “A good man leaves an inheritance to his children’s children…”

It’s easy to get caught up in the now.
Urgency pulls at us constantly- bills to pay, goals to chase, boxes to check. And while there’s wisdom in living with focus and drive, we were never meant to live with only the short game in mind.

God’s economy runs on a bigger calendar.
He thinks in generations. In legacies. In eternity.

When Jesus said, “Where your treasure is, there your heart will be also” (Matthew 6:21), He wasn’t just talking about money. He was talking about direction. Because whatever you consistently invest in – whether it’s time, resources, or attention – your heart will eventually follow.

That’s why this principle matters:
Short-term thinking leads to survival. Long-term thinking leads to legacy.

Proverbs 13:22 tells us that “a good man leaves an inheritance to his children’s children.” That’s not just about a bank account – it’s about a life that echoes into the future.
A man who lives generously.
A man who builds with wisdom.
A man whose kids, and grandkids, will walk on trails he carved with faith and discipline.

That kind of life doesn’t happen by accident.
It takes intentionality. It takes obedience. And it takes the courage to live for something more than applause, promotions, or comfort.

When you think eternally, you handle today differently.
You parent differently.
You manage money differently.
You serve differently.
Because you know it all adds up – not just here, but forever.

So give when it’s easier to keep.
Lead when it’s easier to coast.
Speak truth when it would be safer to stay quiet.
Live like the Kingdom of God is real – because it is.

That’s a wrap on this series

Get to Work. Get Honest. Get in Position.

This is the final post in the Made to Produce series—and I hope it’s been both a challenge and an encouragement.

Here’s what we’ve walked through together:

You were made to produce – Work isn’t punishment. It’s purpose.
Work in your giftings – Your calling flows from your design.
Honesty is a big deal – God blesses clean hands and a clean heart.
Blessing is attached to diligence – Faithfulness builds what luck never could.
Money is a worship issue – God doesn’t bless your tips. He blesses your trust.
Be smart with money – Stewardship begins with wisdom, not guesswork.
Be wary of debt – Don’t let borrowed money steal your future freedom.
Be wary of covetousness – Comparison kills contentment.
Think long-term – Legacy is built one faithful step at a time.

This wasn’t about getting rich.
It was about getting free.
Free to serve. Free to give. Free to walk in your calling without being chained to the patterns of this world.

So wherever you are—start today.
Get to work.
Get honest.
Get in position.

God doesn’t multiply what you refuse to surrender.

Let’s build something that outlasts us.

Be Wary of Covetousness

Exodus 20:17 – “You shall not covet… anything that belongs to your neighbor.”
Luke 12:15 – “Watch out! Be on your guard against all kinds of greed; life does not consist in an abundance of possessions.”

Let me be real:
It’s hard to scroll social media and not feel like you’re behind.
You see the new car, the vacation pics, the seemingly perfect marriage, the six-figure side hustle. And without even realizing it, something subtle starts to creep in…

Comparison.
Envy.
Discontentment.

It’s not always loud or obvious. Sometimes it sounds like, “Why not me?” or “If I just had what they have…” That quiet voice can spiral fast—and before long, you’ve stopped being thankful for what’s in your hand because you’re too busy staring at what’s in someone else’s.

That’s the danger of covetousness, wanting what someone else has so badly that it clouds your purpose and poisons your perspective. It’s one of the Ten Commandments for a reason (Exodus 20:17), not because God wants to restrict us, but because He knows how easily our hearts get distracted.

Jesus warned in Luke 12:15, “Watch out! Be on your guard against all kinds of greed; life does not consist in an abundance of possessions.”
That’s a strong “watch out” – because comparison doesn’t just make you feel behind… it blinds you.

It blinds you to the blessings in your own life.
It blinds you to the unique calling God placed on your path.
It blinds you to how far you’ve already come.

One of the most freeing moments in my life was realizing that I’m not called to their race, I’m called to mine.
And my job isn’t to match someone else’s highlight reel – it’s to be faithful with what God has put in front of me today.

Want to protect your heart from envy? Try this:

Every time you catch yourself comparing, stop and say out loud one thing you’re grateful for.
Seriously, train your eyes to see blessings, not gaps. Gratitude is spiritual armor against covetousness.

And when someone else wins? Celebrate them. Don’t just scroll past – speak life. The kingdom isn’t a competition. We rise together.

So be wary of envy. It’s sneaky. It looks harmless. But it will rob you blind – and smile while doing it.
Don’t let it.

Your life, your gifts, your pace – they’re enough when surrendered to God.
And He never called you to look like them.
He called you to look like Christ.

So stay in your lane. Keep your eyes up. And run your race well.

Be Wary of Debt

Proverbs 22:7 – “The rich rule over the poor, and the borrower is slave to the lender.”

I’ll be honest, this is one of those principles I wish I had fully grasped in my twenties.

Debt is so normalized in our culture that we barely question it. Swipe now, pay later. Finance it. Stretch it. Reward points. Zero interest for 12 months. You’ve heard the pitch.
And while not all debt is evil, let’s be clear – debt always comes with a cost.

The Bible doesn’t say debt is a sin, but it does say that the borrower becomes a slave to the lender (Proverbs 22:7). That’s strong language. And it’s not just poetic, it’s painfully practical.
When your paycheck is already spoken for before it hits your bank account, you’re not free.
When you want to follow God into something bold – but debt holds you back – you’re not free.
When you’re anxious all the time because of what you owe, that’s not abundance. That’s bondage.

And here’s the part we don’t like to admit:
Debt often replaces discipline.
It lets us have what we haven’t earned, build what God hasn’t told us to build, or project an image that doesn’t match reality.

I’ve seen it in my own life, times when I got ahead of God, chasing what looked like opportunity but ended up feeling like a trap. And I’ve seen others with big dreams and God-given gifts… stuck. Not because they didn’t have the potential, but because debt had already sold off their margin.

So what’s the better way?

Ask first. Build slow. Live free.
Before you sign for anything, take it to God.
Luke 14:28 reminds us to count the cost before building the tower. It’s not just about money- it’s about wisdom, timing, and trust.

Ask:

“Do I really need this?”
“Is this adding value or adding pressure?”
“Is this God’s plan or my impatience?”

And if you’re already buried in debt, there’s hope. You don’t get free overnight, but you can get free. Start small. Make a plan. Cut back. Stay humble. Stay consistent. Freedom comes step by step.

Because ultimately, this is about more than just financial strategy, it’s about spiritual posture.
You can’t live fully surrendered to God while being enslaved to money.

Debt doesn’t just affect your wallet, it affects your future, your peace, your family, your purpose.
So be wise. Be watchful. Be free.

You weren’t made for enslavement – you were made for stewardship.
Every dollar, every opportunity, every possession belongs to God. You’re not building your own kingdom, you’re managing His.

And God is still in the business of helping His people walk out of bondage—one obedient, faithful step at a time.

Be Smart with Money

Proverbs 21:5 – “The plans of the diligent lead surely to abundance, but everyone who is hasty comes only to poverty.”

Let’s be honest—most of us were never taught how to handle money. We were taught how to earn it… maybe even how to give a little of it… but when it came to managing what’s left? A lot of us were just winging it.

But here’s what I’ve come to realize:
Worship is what you give. Wisdom is what you do with the rest.

In other words, giving God your first is a spiritual act of trust—but how you handle what’s left is just as important.
Because the Bible doesn’t just speak to generosity—it speaks to stewardship.

Luke 14:28 says, “Suppose one of you wants to build a tower. Won’t you first sit down and estimate the cost to see if you have enough money to complete it?”
Jesus wasn’t giving a financial seminar—He was teaching about discipleship. But He used a financial principle to make His point: count the cost. Plan ahead. Don’t guess.

I’ve watched men pray for financial breakthrough while living paycheck to paycheck with no plan, no budget, and no discipline. I’ve been that man myself. But at some point, I had to realize:
God won’t bless what you won’t take responsibility for.

Proverbs 27:23-24 says, “Be sure you know the condition of your flocks, give careful attention to your herds; for riches do not endure forever…”
In today’s language, that might sound like: “Know your bank accounts. Track your spending. Don’t just hope—manage.”

Here’s a simple place to start:
Look back at your last 30 days of spending—print out your bank statement or download the data. Grab a highlighter.

Highlight needs in one color: rent, utilities, groceries, gas.
Highlight wants in another: eating out, subscriptions, online shopping.
Tally up both.

What you’ll likely find is that you don’t have an income problem—you have a clarity problem. And once you see where your money is going, you can tell it where to go on purpose.

That’s the first step toward a budget that reflects your values, not just your habits.

Because money is a tool. A powerful one. But tools require skill.
You don’t hand a power saw to someone who won’t learn how to use it. Likewise, God entrusts more to those who show they can be trusted with a little (Luke 16:10).

So here’s the challenge:
Start paying attention. Make a plan. Build a budget. Cut what’s wasteful. Invest what’s wise. Get help if you need it.

Guessing with money is how men stay broke.
But planning with wisdom is how men build something that lasts.

The goal isn’t to be rich—the goal is to be faithful.
And when you’re faithful with your finances, you gain more than control—you gain peace.

Because wisdom with money doesn’t just change your wallet.
It changes your future.
And it honors the One who gave it to you.