Kids say the darnedest things. When they are young and brutally honest, we make light of the moments where they point out an obvious observance that make the adults all weird and uncomfortable. But as they get older, their words can carry more weight and power. By the time they are young adults, they can yield their words like a sharp sword causing pain and destruction with every wild swing. Do they intend to wreak havoc? Certainly not. But chances are, they have not considered the impact outside of their self-centered point of view. They will say words to you that you did not think they were capable of uttering. And your heart will break.
When raising them, there are some clear objectives; Love them. Nourish them. Keep them safe. Teach them right from wrong. And you will see success many times throughout their lives. You will witness signs of them becoming wonderful young men and women, and you will feel love and accomplishment many times over. However, no matter how good you did raising stellar children, they will stray from the lessons you have taught. They will inevitably step off path and make mistakes. They will forget the lessons you have taught them, or perhaps just blatantly ignore them. Though the severity will vary, they will falter. And your heart will break.
As a father, I have been crushed by my children’s words. But I have been encouraged by their hearts. I have been devastated to witness some of their decisions. But I have been proud of their accomplishments. Through every peak and valley, I have loved them the same. I have had an unconscious forgiveness of every hurtful word or misdeed. Regardless of the situation, I am here as a shoulder to cry on, a hand to dust them off, encouragement to lift them up, and advice to help them recover. As frustrated and discouraged as I might be, I know the wholesome and good that is inside of them. And while sometimes loving them does not always feel good to them, I am always faithful.
As I grow in my faith, I cannot help but imagine this is similar to how my Heavenly Father has felt and dealt with me throughout my life of poor choices and painful words. Every time I have taken Him for granted or walked disobediently through this world. Yet, He is there. Allowing me to reap what I sow, but always comforting the blow with his unwavering and faithful love. Don’t get me wrong, I am not comparing my flawed existence to God’s perfection. I am only suggesting that while I regularly fall short of His example, I can relate to love He feels and pain I have caused Him.
I am far from a perfect father. But I have the perfect role model. I hope that one day my children understand the love I have for them by loving children of their own. And I hope that they experience the love of our Heavenly Father the way I do.
I know this post is a little dark, in fact it is a lot darker than a post about my kids should be. But this is just where I am today after a pretty rough situation and self reflection yesterday. My children are wonderful humans. And I know I have a ton to be grateful for – in fact – I am grateful for all of the good and uplifting things they say and do. But the point of focusing on the dark is to point out the hope in the things that don’t always seem hopeful. Because I am also grateful for light that shines in the dark.
Dadvotionals 